A Letter to Neale

Reader Question:

Dear Neale,

I hope this e-mail is read by you because I do have a question that has been bothering me for a long time. I have just finished all four books in Conversations with God and have found them to be profoundly valuable in my experience to have a relationship with God. People say that they love God, but I always found that to be somewhat superficial because can anyone really say they know God and have developed a relationship where they have fallen in love with Him/Her (and I am not speaking about you because you seem to have fallen in love with God through your work). I am trying to develop this HONEST FEELING of LOVING GOD.

Well, here is my question: I lost my only child, Timmy, in an automobile accident on Friday, August 13, 1999. You might say he came into the world through an accident because on Friday, September 13, 1974 I had an automobile accident while I was 8 months pregnant. We survived, fortunately, but he was born almost a month early as a result of my water breaking from the traumatic experience of the accident. When he was born I was 24 years old just shy of my 25th birthday. When he died he was 24 just shy of his 25th birthday. When I was in labor with him I developed some severe knots in my hair that took many weeks to get out. When he died those same knots came back and it took a hairdresser and cutting off my hair to get them out.

Since 1985 I have been on a path about what death is all about to the point where my son one day said to me, "Mom you read all these near death experience books and other books about death and dying that I am afraid you are going to die". I told him I was tough and wouldn't die for a long time. Never knowing that he would go first. Before I read your books, I read the Journey of the Souls and the Destiny of the Souls by Dr. Michael Newton. In those books it declares that your child is no longer your child, your husband no longer your husband, and mother and father no longer that because they just played those roles in your present life time. If that is true, it is disheartening to me that my son is no longer my son. It hurts me to think that he will choose a new mother from our so called "soul group" and continue another existence with another family for his soul development. Excuse me if that sounds selfish, but it is hurtful enough to loose him without thinking that he is no longer my son anymore.

This has been and continues to be a long path for me. I have accepted his death because I do not have a choice, but to realize that he is no longer my son is devastating to me. Can you shed some light on this for me? Your testimony of God feels so right, so comforting. Can you tell me more, with your acquired wisdoms and knowledge what this is all about. I am saddened to think your conversations with God has stopped in your writings and I cannot gleam any more knowledge from a continuation of these wonderfully, spiritual books.

Please, Neale, if you could possibly find the time to reply directly, I would be so grateful for some inspiration on this subject.

A forever student of the Universe, Helen.


Neale Responds

My dear Helen,

The very first thing that I want you to do is to go to www.amazon.com and order a copy of HOME WITH GOD in a Life That Never Ends. If you do that right now, after reading this, you can have a copy in your hands tomorrow. Then begin reading it and don't stop until you finish. In many ways it is almost as if this book was written for you.

In this final dialogue, God explains that "death is a process of re-identification." Each soul lives forever, and in the Time After Death the soul moves through a three-stage process in which it (1) ceases to identify with its body; (2) ceases to identify with its mind; (3) ceases to identify with its soul, merging at last with the Oneness, the Essence of Being that some of us call God. This is the Journey Home, and it is a joyful, wonder-filled journey that each spiritual entity takes after death, which is not death at all, but merely birth in another form.

Through all the annals of time it will be recorded that you gave physicality to the soul that has been called your son. Yet this soul is much greater than the localized, individual identity that it took on at the moment of this birth. In that sense, this soul is "no longer your son" -- nor would you want it to be. The soul is eternal, everlasting, and not limited in its identity with any individual incarnation, except when it chooses to be re-focused in that way.

What this means is that the gigantic spirit that is your son's soul can "get small again," reducing itself to one of its singular notions of itself, at any time in the Hereafter. What I am saying is that, as I understand it, the Individualized Essence of Being appearing in your lifetime as the soul of your son can, and does, reassume that specific identity at will, and it always chooses to do so at the slightest loving thought of him.

Souls, in truth, Helen, are "shape shifters" -- even as is God Himself. A soul never, ever forgets a shape it has once assumed, and no individual identity (the soul lives many lifetimes) is ever abandoned or lost or "set aside" forever simply because a particular physical life has ended. Rather, a soul may, as I have already said, reform itself around a specific shape whenever it wishes to do so. And one of the things that causes it to do so is Love.

Love is a particular form of Pure Energy that comes closest to resembling the Essential Energy of God, and when a soul is thought of with Love, that soul responds by reforming itself into the shape that it took when it was the object of the Love it is now feeling, and it will fly to the person thinking of it in that way. Love is a magnet that draws all souls to us, both those living in the physical realm and those living in the spiritual realm.

In this way, you son always retains his identity--at the same time that his Eternal Essence enlarges beyond it. This is a Divine Dichotomy that can only be fully understood in the context of a Greater awareness within which two apparently contradictory truths can exist simultaneously in the same space. Thus, the answer to your question, Helen, is that your son both is and is not "your son" through all eternity.

The near perfect symmetry of your son's life--the apparent "coincidences" having to do with his birth and death--suggests a Divine Plan and a level of Divine Intervention that reaches way beyond human comprehension. See this perfect design for what I believe that it is: a clear "signal" from one soul to another that a very high level of co-creation has been going on. I believe that this soul may be much more than simply your son, but may, in fact, be one of your Soul Partners through all eternity---an Aspect of the Single Self, dividing and reuniting through the eons of time, coming and going in each other's physical lives, co-creating on the Canvas of Forever an eternal experience of Love in every form. In other words, the experience of Who You Really Are, physicalized.

Be grateful for this experience, having had it once again, my dear Helen, and yearn not for, nor mourn the loss of, that which you will always have and which cannot be set aside by anyone or any belief: an eternal connection with the soul you have known most recently as your son. Celebrate this connection, and allow it to nourish you all the days of your life, and of your Endless Forevers.

May God's wisdom and comfort be visited upon you now, and expressed through you even during all the days of your life.

Blessed be....


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